Politically Correct Sunday (not)

Sometimes late at night the tv will be on Big Brother After Dark while I'm going to sleep and as I half-listen I'll sometimes think "Who's that guy??" and it always turns out to be Shelly, but one other time I got all confused seeing Kalia doing all this housework and gameplaying until I saw this:

And I was like, "OOOOOHHHHHHHH. That wasn't Kalia doing all that work, that was Shelly, just with a massive über-tan. Totally makes more sense." Duh. But dang that tan must be weighing an extra 2-3 pounds on her!

And I'm sorry, Rachel is so in love with Jeff, and Jeff knows it which is why her key came out of that nomination box first. He knows he can manipulate her and can even tame her, and it all just makes his ego grow even larger and the Humilitarded eat even more Lucky Charms. I read that earlier today Jeff addressed Jordan as "Hey, Stupid," and that Adam told him that he can no longer call her that since she's not wearing the Humilitard. "Hey, Big Jerk," is that the patron saint of wifebeaters around your neck? It certainly looks like a religious medal, has he been wearing it all summer? I hadn't noticed, it looks sort of like it's dueling with Adam's teeny weeny Star of David that he wears beneath his bacon shirt and I have definitely seen Adam touchy about the subject, one night Jeff didn't acclaim Adam's grandmother's latkes enough and it wasn't long before Adam was cleaning a lot and talking like he was in a concentration camp where presumably Jeff was, a Nazi. It was really tense, everyone else went outside and dropped it but Adam remained all riled up inside, muttering to the cameras about the drama and how interesting the DR sessions would be because of it. So I dunno, I guess when you add wifebeater and anti-semite to the previous list of "racist, homophobe, douchebag" it makes me not so sure this was Jeff's season to shine, except for maybe on CBS.

Also on CBS, this commercial totally caught me off guard and garnered the biggest laughs of the night, certainly bigger than the laughs of discomfort over (smite them!) Porsche's fed DR lines.

For once, truth in advertising. Velveeta is liquid gold...and the solid form doesn't suck either.

Sauerkraut, Sour Grapes

Yup, that was a tall drink of Sour Grapes that Jordan only half-chugged during this week's Have/Have Not comp, still she managed to blame her team's loss on Shelly for, gasp, not listening to her thug boyfriend. It is true, America's Sweetheart has been Have-Notted to the brink and the veneer is sort of, cracking. "Big Jeff" might find it hard to watch someone "so pure and so innocent" crying out her baby blues, but we here in Libbytown are just kicking back in our comfy livingrooms with the low lighting and the lots of comfort carbs as we lift our glass to say "geaux, tiger," wondering if Jordan has noticed that Dani and Kalia have each won just as many HoH's as she has, which is sort of a lot for players who didn't enter the house with a spouse. Maybe Jordan's angry because she knows if her boyfriend wins the PoV (which he has) that there's a hefty probability that he'll throw her in harm's way. He was gloating a little bit of Jeff/Rachel sexual tension (I know!) in Jordan's face during Big Brother After Dark last night, that the Jeff/Rachel fighting was turning more into flirting. Presumably Jordan noticed it too considering her bizarre comments to Jeff about how certain things in the house SMELL LIKE FISH and randomly shouting about how important in life it is to HAVE STANDARDS. Poor Jordan, but honestly, as a previous winner she should have been embarrassed to walk back into that house. Give someone else a chance. Even Evel Dick had the sense to choose drugs over spending the summer with Jeff.

Other Sunday Thoughts:

Can Shelly ever, ever be more painful to watch?

Was Kalia's "Kalia's Room" plaque carved by a golden retriever?

Could I be more surprised by Rachel's content enthusiasm for Have-Not catfish?

Who would trust Shelly?

Who notices that all this season's HoH's have been female?

Does Jeff ever realize that his approach SUCKS?

Sunday Night Profile

Lawon

In tonight's episode Lawon reminds viewers that he is a competitor, just as we viewers "know." This might not mean he can move his ski hips like a birthworthy BB houseguest, but he sure's got the styyle to bring the HOH Robe back to the airwaves and it's a little unclear whether his Liberace-Soulbrother Coming Out story was meant to encourage CBS-watchin' At Risk Youth of America, or if it was meant for Shelly. Crafty.

 

Game. Play. 

Elsewise, still rocking on Dani, maybe she's showing a smidge too much pride but she deserves it. Loved it when she told Kalia to "Hey Kalia...Shut up," and how she got Jeff to admit he was swallowing his pride. The BB internet constituents have been weighing her options, now that Male Boo-kie has won the POV. Will he take off himself, will he be Rachel's knight in Penisgate armor, will Daniele backdoor Jeff or put up Jordan opposite Rachel, or will she target Shelly/Lawon in suspicion of their games. Breathlessly waiting to know!

...oh, and was that Jeff NOT staying with Jordan in the Have-Not room all the while bragging about his $10K?? If yes then, dammmn.

Don't Hassel with the Relationshit

Eau mah gaude, I can't imagine what it is like in that house, where the constant arguments between two virtuously empty people really are just veiled attempts at croco-tears and more narcissism.  Pass!  Still, it's encouraging to know that even know Rachel needs her dream lycra wedding that she kept her rage in check and made sound nominations for her game, even if it means me-n-Dani's boyfriend might be going home, sob!
 

 

 Libbytown Swah-vay!

'Twas yet another episode of Jordan proving that she's not as dumb and innocent as she appears, she was ON that Hasselhoff shit and I can't disagree with her Luxury Comp guest choices, that's what she does, she makes friends with everyone now so that it payzz off later, it's a proven system.

Sunday Night Points-O-Ponder:

Is that a Magen David over Adam's bacon shirt? (Ah-vah!!)

Do they only speak Cynicism on Planet Jeff?

Could there be anything more insufferable than watching someone grovel to Rachel the HOH room as Brendon holds a coffee cup by the handle? (No!)

Was that Zingbot at this year's Comic Con?

 

Zinnggg!!!

Houseguest Analysis

Sunday Night show just aired, some Libbythoughts:

Brenchel's game is so pedestrian, especially as they're vets, and Rachel's retelling of that "Porsche's here for a month!" story was predictably favorable toward herself, and sloppy gameplay all around.

Jordan.  This week she's sitting pretty and feeling REALLY good about it, yet her confidence is barely detectable.  I hope Kalia is taking notes on them for her relationship blog (yeah, right), Jordan wins comps mainly to please Jeff, and after he mows over and ignores the question "Were you happy when I won??" she models a black bra-top to give Jeff a preview what things could be like later in the HOH room.  Soooo healthy!

Jeff, he's a little pedestrian too.  DR lines like "Obviously he's on our side---I hope!" are dumb.

Dominic.  Some of his thoughts and theories are a little off--like his trust in Shelly and his skittish attempt at makin' deals with the other side in the HOH room--but Dominic has a lot of raw power.  He got Jeff all jumpy and agitated early in the episode, over-rubbing his feet and stuttering enough to give Dominic the chance to ask "Whut?"  And then "somehow" he was going to get Dani on his and Cassi's side, it wasn't long before we saw what "somehow" meant, Dom insists "the only way" to converse with her was by flirting.  His conversational skills lacked no prowess in that hammock, the newbie turned the vet fanatical, but my favorite Dominic the Dominator moment has to be when he dominated Brendon from a submissive totally gay floor pose.  I'm pretty sure Superbrendon now lives in his back pocket, or at least fantasizes about it.  In the DR Dom mentioned making deals with the devil, I sort of think he is the devil, even his name means "God" which is clearly a dark subliminal joke.  I dunno, he still has a few missteps, maybe he's Devil Jr., either way, Libbytown likey.

Cassi--She's smart, she's confident, she's gonna eff things up if she gets too involved with this Rachel childishness.  As far as I'm concerned, she can stay.

Shelly--Ullggh.

Lawon--Don't care.

Kalia--I'm trying to not give into the petty "luv-2-hate" reaction she gives me.  I can't stand it when overemotional people think they're so smart.  Who trusts a relationship blogger who says things like "Lawon's future grandchildren?"

Adam--I like him better than I did initially, but agree with Jordan's nomination based on not knowing where his head's at.

The Online Edickt

Evel Dick has issued a statement* about his early departure, it takes him 9 minutes to basically say that he's whipped by some insecure woman who has a telephone.

Whether the "very personal" matter is genuine, it's clear that before his dparture Dick had one of the stronger strategies on the floor, aligning with Former HGs and manipulating the newbie (and vet!) fan whores, he's so wormy. Dominic is also onto something, he was able to work with the twist and concoct, and brand, The Regulators...but wait, he didn't know who Daniele was? Oh, and he's also an oily beauhunk 25yo virgin from San Francisco, mm hmm.

Other skimmed thoughts....Daniele doesn't seem committed to the game, but I hope her attitude, and maybe the Maria Shriver look, change. Keith's milk-humping was full of CHARLATAN! I'm curious why they gave the womens prison line for Shelly to say. I wonder if Jordan can fake dumb all the way to the bank, again. Rachel and Brendon are still DUMB!

*This may or may not link to the recorded statement about his departure, there seemed to be some linkplay by RTVZone.com at the time of posting.