Politically Correct Sunday (not)

Sometimes late at night the tv will be on Big Brother After Dark while I'm going to sleep and as I half-listen I'll sometimes think "Who's that guy??" and it always turns out to be Shelly, but one other time I got all confused seeing Kalia doing all this housework and gameplaying until I saw this:

And I was like, "OOOOOHHHHHHHH. That wasn't Kalia doing all that work, that was Shelly, just with a massive über-tan. Totally makes more sense." Duh. But dang that tan must be weighing an extra 2-3 pounds on her!

And I'm sorry, Rachel is so in love with Jeff, and Jeff knows it which is why her key came out of that nomination box first. He knows he can manipulate her and can even tame her, and it all just makes his ego grow even larger and the Humilitarded eat even more Lucky Charms. I read that earlier today Jeff addressed Jordan as "Hey, Stupid," and that Adam told him that he can no longer call her that since she's not wearing the Humilitard. "Hey, Big Jerk," is that the patron saint of wifebeaters around your neck? It certainly looks like a religious medal, has he been wearing it all summer? I hadn't noticed, it looks sort of like it's dueling with Adam's teeny weeny Star of David that he wears beneath his bacon shirt and I have definitely seen Adam touchy about the subject, one night Jeff didn't acclaim Adam's grandmother's latkes enough and it wasn't long before Adam was cleaning a lot and talking like he was in a concentration camp where presumably Jeff was, a Nazi. It was really tense, everyone else went outside and dropped it but Adam remained all riled up inside, muttering to the cameras about the drama and how interesting the DR sessions would be because of it. So I dunno, I guess when you add wifebeater and anti-semite to the previous list of "racist, homophobe, douchebag" it makes me not so sure this was Jeff's season to shine, except for maybe on CBS.

Also on CBS, this commercial totally caught me off guard and garnered the biggest laughs of the night, certainly bigger than the laughs of discomfort over (smite them!) Porsche's fed DR lines.

For once, truth in advertising. Velveeta is liquid gold...and the solid form doesn't suck either.

Cute as a Stupid Little Button

That quote there in the title, is not mine. It's what Jeff called the pigtails Jordan wore with the Humilitard she won for a week from the PoV comp, an outfit of course she pretends to hate. Just moments prior Jeff was nominating Jordan for canonization for taking the veto away from someone who is on the block and forcing her into an awkward phone call and 24 hours of confinement. Oh the tears, I don't get these people, I just know that Brendon is edited to be a little too enthusiastic over the zombie metaphor. It feels like viewers might get a zombie theme soon.

CBS - 1987
(I know these two aren't zombies but close enough, right.)

Sauerkraut, Sour Grapes

Yup, that was a tall drink of Sour Grapes that Jordan only half-chugged during this week's Have/Have Not comp, still she managed to blame her team's loss on Shelly for, gasp, not listening to her thug boyfriend. It is true, America's Sweetheart has been Have-Notted to the brink and the veneer is sort of, cracking. "Big Jeff" might find it hard to watch someone "so pure and so innocent" crying out her baby blues, but we here in Libbytown are just kicking back in our comfy livingrooms with the low lighting and the lots of comfort carbs as we lift our glass to say "geaux, tiger," wondering if Jordan has noticed that Dani and Kalia have each won just as many HoH's as she has, which is sort of a lot for players who didn't enter the house with a spouse. Maybe Jordan's angry because she knows if her boyfriend wins the PoV (which he has) that there's a hefty probability that he'll throw her in harm's way. He was gloating a little bit of Jeff/Rachel sexual tension (I know!) in Jordan's face during Big Brother After Dark last night, that the Jeff/Rachel fighting was turning more into flirting. Presumably Jordan noticed it too considering her bizarre comments to Jeff about how certain things in the house SMELL LIKE FISH and randomly shouting about how important in life it is to HAVE STANDARDS. Poor Jordan, but honestly, as a previous winner she should have been embarrassed to walk back into that house. Give someone else a chance. Even Evel Dick had the sense to choose drugs over spending the summer with Jeff.

Other Sunday Thoughts:

Can Shelly ever, ever be more painful to watch?

Was Kalia's "Kalia's Room" plaque carved by a golden retriever?

Could I be more surprised by Rachel's content enthusiasm for Have-Not catfish?

Who would trust Shelly?

Who notices that all this season's HoH's have been female?

Does Jeff ever realize that his approach SUCKS?

The Antisocial Network

Oy vey, the beat on the internete street is making a Libbyhead spin.  Here are the facts:

HoH: Daniele
Nomination Ceremony: Brenchel
PoV Winner: Brendon
PoV Ceremony: Brendon USES the PoV on RACHEL, Daniele puts JORDAN in her place

It appears that Jordan had pitched the idea to Dani, to place her up as a pawn.  BUTTT that the moment Brendon won PoV, she started campaigning.  Presumably Jordan safely has the votes to stay (Jeff, Shelly, Adam, Kalia, Lawon, [5] vs. Brendon and Porsche [2]), but this doesn't stop Brenchel from further ruining their rep with awkward bullheaded campaign efforts.  Anywhich way it goes, it is as official as a Chen-nouncement that it is official, the Vet alliance will be broken up.  BUTTT, there is heavy speculation that the evicted houseguests are in sequester and that America's Vote will bring one of them back.  And that America will no way in hell vote our rocket scientist back in.  Because his social game makes him so unlikeable.

Just as in life, in the BB house it doesn't matter how much Ph.D. candidacy you're risking, if you don't know how to work people you'll dent your chances of winning.  Jordan PhD's in the social game, she listens to everyone, she knows how to explain things to Rachel so that Rachel understands, she calms Jeff's Rachel-rage, she confidently invites newbies to join her Luxury win, and she worked Daniele to win this vanity (Jeff's Martyr) nomination. She doesn't clobber people with a competitive attitude, but she manipulates their motives with wide eyes and girly blonde hair and a genteel Southern demeanor. She's already won $500k and still people don't see her as a threat.  She's already won $500k.

Rachel's desperation and large muddy insecurity boots turn people away.  Her personality pisses everyone off and puts her at the bottom of the totem pole, and pisses everyone off.  Brendon belongs in the cave of whence he dwells, he knows how to pick a woman with a draggable hairline but he doesn't know how to not sound like a mammoth douchebag.

Jeff, if he didn't look like Jeff there would be little to pay attention to.  I'm sure he'd be good at football or wrestling or any type of sport that relies on bold visible moves and muscles, and I can't say that if he smiled at me I wouldn't smile back, but in the BB house without Jordan he doesn't have a prayer, personably.  Without Jordan's social support Jeff probably couldn't win on his own, which wouldn't be nearly as aggravating if he could get over himself long enough to realize this.

Clearly there's a winner in this underlying bag of social skills, and she's on the block.  Brenchel's presently trying to sell Adam to keep Brendon but their sales skills, are also sucking.  Looks like it's aloha, Brendon.  (America bring back Dom????)

Donato for Mayor of Libbytown

Not only did Daniele vote against the Vets, but girl went on a vengeance and won HOH and then delivered Brenchel a Clifford-sized what-fer! when they came groveling to her in the HOH room. Spank! Word on the interweb street is that Daniele is avenging her house/soul mate and breaking up the Vet alliance and is targeting Brenchel. No protests here in Libbytown, but maybe just the slightest evermost hopeful twinkle-wishes that our Mayor Candidate breaks up Jeff/Jordan instead. As dreadful as Brenchel is, they're sort of pitiful in comparison to the seemingly more privileged J/J, and besides, it was Jeff who was so dominant about getting Dom out. But still, respecting Dani in her win and her choices, for now.

And *just*now* Libbytown wire has received word on nominations. Interested readers may click here for more info.